UNDERWATER Pinocchio sex? Huge water-skiing marionettes? Jacques Cousteau with a 10-metre woody?

A PR smokescreen is engulfing rumours that giant puppets will sail into Fremantle on Sunday.

What we can reliably say is they will board a barge at Langley Park, Perth at 12.30pm.

It is rumoured they will stop at East Street Jetty in Fremantle around 5pm, before going on to the port at Henderson.

The media team from Perth International Arts Festival emphasised there would be “no performance” in Fremantle, but was otherwise coy.

“There could be a final surprise,” a PIAFer cooed.

Mayor Brad Pettitt says he’s been told by PIAF the puppets will not disembark in Freo.

Around a million people are expected to visit Perth this weekend to watch the wooden wonders traipse by. They were created by French company Royale de Luxe French and include a 6-metre girl and an 11-metre sea diver.

Check the Chook’s Facebook page for updates.

by STEPHEN POLLOCK